Naked With Black Socks

Are you comfortable in front of people, or does the idea of public speaking make you want to hide in the bathroom? Why?

No! I am not comfortable in front of people, especially public speaking. My siblings and I sing every so often for Mom in church. She is proud of us and wants to share our voices with everyone. Well, the last time I sang in church it was for Mom’s birthday. Or was it for Mother’s Day? I can’t remember. Somehow, when we all walked to the front of the church, I ended up in the center. While we were singing, I could not look up at the congregation. I felt like all eyes were on me. My voice was shaky and I started to quiver. I kept thinking is this song about over? I need to sit down.

I remember when I was about six years old, we had to sing for Grandpa and Grandma before we could have our Christmas presents. I remember having Christmas in the garage and having to stand on a bench.

I sang in the youth choir in church and went on to sing in the adult choir. I am not sure what happened but I eventually got really nervous singing in front of everyone. Years ago, the nearby churches got together to sing a cantata. We traveled to the different churches to sing. At the church in Holstein, MO, we were about to sing and I started quivering. I felt very faint. The person next to me asked me if I was okay. She said my face was very flushed. I whispered how I felt. She suggested that I go sit down. Next thing I knew she had helped me down the steps to the basement of the church. She gave me a glass of water and told me to relax. I was embarrassed to walk down the side aisle of the church. I felt like all eyes were on me. Perhaps that is another reason why I cannot be in front of people.

When I was in the eighth grade, I took a class in English. One of the requirements was to speak in front of the class. I absolutely hated that part of the class. The assignment was to write notes on index cards. We were allowed to use those. We had to speak for at least three minutes. My turn arrived and I thought I was going to puke. My speech lasted maybe a minute and a half. I kept looking at the clock and sifting my cards. Needless to say, those three minutes seem to last forever!!! Finally, Mr. Cheeks, the teacher, told me to sit down. I was hoping the floor would open up and swallow me. No such luck!

Even trying to visualize the crowd in their underwear did not work. Why? I could not look up to make eye contact.

Have a blessed day!

Laurie Jackson


2 thoughts on “Naked With Black Socks

  1. My sympathies. I have the same problem, and I endured 8th grade “Speech” class (my mother made me enroll. Thought it would help me get over my ‘shyness’) too. But the name “Mr. Cheeks” would have had me laughing so hard, I probably would have failed simply because I couldn’t talk….. what a lovely blog!!

    Liked by 1 person

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